Max’s January lineup includes highly-anticipated new seasons of several original series. First up is the eight-episode HBO drama True Detective: Night Country (Jan. 14), the fourth installment of the True Detective series, this time starring Jodie Foster and Kali Reis as detectives called in to investigate the disappearance of eight researchers into the dark Alaskan winter.

LG is looking to revolutionize the way that gamers pick up new monitors: Instead of forcing them to choose between super-fast refresh rates or high-resolution visuals, the company’s new UltraGear OLED lineup will offer a toggle that lets you switch between 480Hz at 1080P and 240Hz at 4K. It’s the first time we’ve seen a “dual Hz” feature on a monitor, and I can’t wait to add one to my desk.

Unveiled this past week before the tech world becomes lost in the throes of CES, the LG UltraGear 32GS95UE will let you easily swap between resolutions and refresh rates with the flip of a switch. It’s an intriguing feature that caught me off guard at first, but I’m honestly surprised we haven’t seen something like this sooner.

There are, of course, a number of reasons why a dual Hz monitor is enticing—the most important is being able to switch between resolutions and refresh rates depending on what game you’re playing. Many competitive gamers like to play their shooters and competitive titles at a lower 1080P resolution. I currently run two 4K monitors, but I usually bring their resolutions down if I’m playing a shooter and want to take advantage of the highest framerate possible on my rig. The image is still crisp, but it requires opening the monitor’s settings in Windows and manually changing it.

With the LG UltraGear 32GS95UE, I wouldn’t have to do that—I’d just need to flip the toggle switch. When running it in 1080P mode I’ll be able to take advantage of a doubled max framerate; but not all games are created equal, so when I want to play Starfield or Red Dead Redemption 2 in 4K, I won’t have to take extra steps to make that happen.

If that toggle switch wasn’t enough to sell me on it, though, there’s also the fact that the new 32-inch monitor will offer a .03-millisecond grey-to-grey response time, which is exceptionally important. Many gaming monitors offer a 1ms GtG response time, so this will help ensure there isn’t any additional artifacting or motion blur when using it.

LG has also noted that the new monitor will support high-end HDR picture, with DCI-P3 98.5 percent at 400 nits of brightness. It also comes with a virtually borderless design, which is perfect for pairing up two of these bad boys, and even built-in speakers for those days that I’m not feeling my headphones.

Honestly, the only thing holding me back on this new monitor at the moment is the price, which LG has yet to reveal. Once the company announces it, though, it’s on.

Source: LifeHacker – Why LG’s New UltraGear OLED Is My Next Favorite Gaming Monitor

If you’re looking for the Wordle answer for December 23, 2023 read on. We’ll share some clues, tips, and strategies, and finally the solution. Today’s puzzle is medium-ish difficulty; I got it on my third guess. Beware, there are spoilers below for December 23, Wordle #917! Keep scrolling if you want some hints (and then the answer) to today’s Wordle game.

How to play Wordle

Wordle lives here on the New York Times website. A new puzzle goes live every day at midnight, your local time.

Start by guessing a five-letter word. The letters of the word will turn green if they’re correct, yellow if you have the right letter in the wrong place, or gray if the letter isn’t in the day’s secret word at all. For more, check out our guide to playing Wordle here, and my strategy guide here for more advanced tips. (We also have more information at the bottom of this post, after the hints and answers.)

Ready for the hints? Let’s go!

Does today’s Wordle have any unusual letters?

We’ll define common letters as those that appear in the old typesetters’ phrase ETAOIN SHRDLU. (Memorize this! Pronounce it “Edwin Shirdloo,” like a name, and pretend he’s a friend of yours.)

We have four common letters today, and the remaining one is sort of medium-rare. Nothing at the end of the alphabet though.

Can you give me a hint for today’s Wordle?

It will make you think of skiing.

Does today’s Wordle have any double or repeated letters?

Nope, five different letters today.

How many vowels are in today’s Wordle?

There are two vowels in today’s word.

What letter does today’s Wordle start with?

Today’s word starts with S.

What letter does today’s Wordle end with?

Today’s word ends with E.

What is the solution to today’s Wordle?

Ready? Today’s word is SLOPE.

How I solved today’s Wordle

ARISE and TOUCH started me off, as usual, so I knew that there was an E at the end, and an S and O in there somewhere. STOVE and SNORE were out of contention. Hmm, let’s try SLOPE…yep, that’s it!

Wordle 917 3/6

⬜⬜⬜🟨🟩
⬜🟨⬜⬜⬜
🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩

A primer on Wordle basics

The idea of Wordle is to guess the day’s secret word. When you first open the Wordle game, you’ll see an empty grid of letters. It’s up to you to make the first move: type in any five-letter word. 

Now, you can use the colors that are revealed to get clues about the word: 

• Green means you correctly guessed a letter, and it’s in the correct position. (For example, if you guess PARTY, and the word is actually PURSE, the P and R will be green.)

• Yellow means the letter is somewhere in the word, but not in the position you guessed it. (For example, if you guessed PARTY, but the word is actually ROAST, the R, A and T will all be yellow.)

• Gray means the letter is not in the solution word at all. (If you guessed PARTY and everything is gray, then the solution cannot be PURSE or ROAST.)

With all that in mind, guess another word, and then another, trying to land on the correct word before you run out of chances. You get six guesses, and then it’s game over.

The best starter words for Wordle

What should you play for that first guess? The best starters tend to contain common letters, to increase the chances of getting yellow and green squares to guide your guessing. (And if you get all grays when guessing common letters, that’s still excellent information to help you rule out possibilities.) There isn’t a single “best” starting word, but the New York Times’s Wordle analysis bot has suggested starting with one of these:

• CRANE

• TRACE

• SLANT

• CRATE

• CARTE

Meanwhile, an MIT analysis found that you’ll eliminate the most possibilities in the first round by starting with one of these:

• SALET

• REAST

• TRACE

• CRATE

• SLATE

Other good picks might be ARISE or ROUND. Words like ADIEU and AUDIO get more vowels in play, but you could argue that it’s better to start with an emphasis on consonants, using a starter like RENTS or CLAMP. Choose your strategy, and see how it plays out.

How to win at Wordle

We have a few guides to Wordle strategy, which you might like to read over if you’re a serious student of the game. This one covers how to use consonants to your advantage, while this one focuses on a strategy that uses the most common letters. In this advanced guide, we detail a three-pronged approach for fishing for hints while maximizing your chances of winning quickly.

The biggest thing that separates Wordle winners from Wordle losers is that winners use their guesses to gather information about what letters are in the word. If you know that the word must end in -OUND, don’t waste four guesses on MOUND, ROUND, SOUND, and HOUND; combine those consonants and guess MARSH. If the H lights up in yellow, you know the solution.

One more note on strategy: the original Wordle used a list of about 2,300 solution words, but after the game was bought by the NYT, the game now has an editor who hand-picks the solutions. Sometimes they are slightly tricky words that wouldn’t have made the original list, and sometimes they are topical. For example, FEAST was the solution one Thanksgiving. So keep in mind that there may be a theme.

Wordle alternatives

If you can’t get enough of five-letter guessing games and their kin, the best Wordle alternatives, ranked by difficulty, include:

• Wheeldle, which lets you play one puzzle after another

• Dordle and Quordle, which ask you to play two (Dordle) or four (Quordle) puzzles at the same time, with the same guesses. There is also Octordle, with eight puzzles, and Sedecordle, with 16.

• Waffle, which shows you several five-letter words, scrambled in a grid; you play by swapping the letters around until you solve.

• Absurdle, which changes the solution after each guess, but needs to stay consistent with its previous feedback. You have to strategically back it into a corner until there is only one possible word left; then you guess it, and win.

• Squabble, in which you play Wordle against other people with a timer running. You take damage if you spend too much time between guesses; winner is the last one standing.

• Antiwordle, in which you are trying not to guess the day’s solution. You’re required to reuse any letters that you (oops) guessed correctly, so the longer it takes you, the better you are at the game.

Source: LifeHacker – Today’s Wordle Hints (and Answer) for Saturday, December 23, 2023

It’s estimated that a million e-bikes were sold in the United States in 2023, and the holidays have no doubt brought an army of excited new riders to the fold. If that’s you, congratulations on your new ride and hobby! But please read this before you ride off into the sunset. E-bikes are faster and heavier than normal bikes, making them more dangerous if you don’t know what you’re doing. The following tips will lessen your chances of breaking your fool neck on your new ride. 

If you didn’t get an e-bike this year for Christmas, show Santa that you can take care of yourself by buying one these awesome e-bikes.

Suggested products

Aventon Pace 500.3 e-bike

Five Ten Freerider DLX Mountain Bike Shoes

CXWXC Road/MTB Bike Pedals

AstroAI Tire Inflator Portable Air Compressor Pump

Before you go on your first ride

Read the manual

Don’t take your first cruise around the neighborhood until you’ve read the manual. Most e-bike controls are easy to understand but some have unusual quirks, and it’s better to learn about them before you’re on the road. 

Wear a helmet

The benefit of wearing a helmet in preventing serious head injuries during bike accidents is obvious, but it’s even more important to protect your brain if you’re riding an unfamiliar, motorized vehicle. All helmets are not the same, so make sure yours is solid, comfortable, and properly fitted. While any helmet is better than no helmet, the best solution is a helmet designed for the faster speeds of e-biking.

Wear the right shoes

When it comes to safety, your shoes are not nearly as important as your helmet, but they still matter. You could pick up a pair of stiff-soled shoes specifically made for biking, but for casual riding, you can get away with a pair of tennis shoes, as long as they fit snugly enough to stay on your feet and don’t have anything that winds around the pedals or chain—watch the laces. Never ride barefoot, in flip-flops, or in sandals. If you get more serious, a decent pair of mountain biking shoes and some good pedals will keep your feet in place while you ride.

Wear brightly colored clothing

Wear brightly colored clothing to stay as visible as possible to drivers and other bikers. Make sure nothing you have on can get entangled in the pedals or in the chain. Bike shorts aren’t mandatory, but they do a lot to keep your bum from hurting.

Install a mirror

I confess, I hate bike mirrors, but I recognize the wisdom of not having to take my eyes off the road to glance behind me. 

Check your ride

Before you head out, check the following on your bike: 

1. Tire pressure: Read the manual for proper PSI and pump ‘em up. A decent pump with a pressure gauge is mandatory.

2. Battery stability: Many e-bikes have removable batteries. Make sure they’re seated correctly and snapped into place.

3. Nuts and bolts: Before you ride a new bike, check that everything is securely affixed  together. This is especially important if you bought it at a chain store, where it was likely assembled by someone with no special knowledge about bikes—but check even if your new bike came from a bike shop or arrived pre-built. You never know. Make sure the handlebars are securely in place, the brake rotors are seated correctly, the pedals screwed in all the way, and the saddle secured at the right height. 

4. Check the brakes: Roll your bike forward and squeeze each brake lever to make sure they’re on-point. 

5. Check the front wheel: Most bikes have easily removable front wheels—useful, but they can look OK at a casual glance, even though they’re not seated correctly. So get in there and give it a close inspection, and make sure the release skewer is tight enough while you’re at it. 

6. Drop test: If everything seems good with your new ride, give it one more test: Lift it six inches or so off the ground and drop it. There shouldn’t be any alarming rattles or bangs, and nothing should shake loose. 

Visit your local bike shop for an inspection

If you have any doubts about your new bike’s assembly (or your own ability to tell whether your bike is properly assembled) take it to your local bike shop and ask ‘em to take a look. 

Find and use the speed limiter

It’s not usually advertised, but most e-bikes allow users to tinker with the top-speed to set their own speed limit. Until you know what you’re doing, it makes sense to dial it down a notch. Changing the speed limit on some e-bikes can be done in 30 seconds using an iPhone app, but for some bikes, it’s a fairly complex operation, so check the manual or the manufacturer’s website for instructions.

Plan your route

Before you head out on your first trip, plan where you’re going. Keep it to bike paths or roads with very few cars until you know what you’re doing. Don’t be like me on my first e-bike ride and end up having to make a left on a busy, five-way LA intersection on a bike I could barely control. Also: Make a longer route than you think you need: Riding an e-bike is stupid fun, and you’ll probably end up going farther than you planned. 

Tips for staying safe on your first e-bike ride

Now that you’ve done your pre-ride inspection and planned a route, here are some on-the-road things to keep in mind.

Practice in a parking lot

Before you hit the road or bike path on your first e-bike ride, practice in an empty parking lot or other open, mellow spot. It takes a little time to get used to riding a powered bicycle, so start with no obstacles around, make some turns, test the brakes, and play around until you feel ready to hit a bike path.

Push it without power

Whenever I ride a new bike, I pedal it a little with no assist to get a feel for the weight and handling without the added torque. Then, I gradually go through the assist levels and gears to get an idea of how it will perform on the road.

Respect the throttle

If your new e-bike comes with a throttle, don’t use it until you feel somewhat comfortable with the pedal assist. And when you do, take it gradually. Throttles can deliver a “jolt” of power that can be alarming and result in a crash. 

Start slowly

Once you’re headed out on the bike path, start slowly; only increase your speed when you’re confident and comfortable. Part of what makes e-bikes uniquely dangerous is that riders don’t have to “earn” their speed. If you’re moving at 28 mph on a regular bike, It’s because you’ve ridden a ton, and successfully controlled yourself at lower speeds first (or made a bad decision at the top of a hill). E-bikes don’t have that learning curve. A class 3 e-bike can reach 28mph without much effort, and an untrained rider going nearly 30 mph without proper respect for their velocity is a recipe for disaster.

Watch your weight

E-bikes are much heavier than analog bikes. Not only does this make mounting and dismounting them more difficult, it also adds to the momentum and changes the way they handle. Be aware of this and don’t take risks or try to ride your new, heavy bike like an Italian road bike. 

Mind the brakes

Because e-bikes are heavier and faster than analog bikes, they almost all require disc brakes. These are far superior to caliper or coaster brakes of older bikes, but they take a little getting used to. Remember to brake earlier than you would on a non-electric bike to account for the longer stopping time.

Stay off the sidewalks

Most new bikers are leery of riding on the street—that’s where the cars are, after all—but riding on the sidewalk is almost always the more dangerous option, even though it can feel safer. Sidewalks are narrow and filled with obstacles. They’re more likely to be uneven, there’s no set traffic pattern, and no one expects you to be there. Streets, on the other hand, have rules. There are cars there, sure, but if bikers and drivers follow the rules, no one needs to get hurt.

Know your local bike laws

If you’re going to ride on streets with traffic, brush up on your local laws and rules regarding biking. In most places, e-bikes follow the same rules as pedal bikes, but not in all places. 

Source: LifeHacker – Read These Safety Tips Before Riding Your New E-bike

Automations are really the best part of smart home hubs, and Google Home has one of the best automation engines out there. In the simplest terms, these automations allow you to set a trigger and a resulting action, like, “At 10 p.m., turn off the speakers,” or, “When I say, ‘let there be light,’ turn on all the household lights.”

If you’ve only set up personal routines, you probably thought the only option for triggers were the limited options offered around time, voice command, or location. These basic actions are great for most of your needs, but at some point, you likely found yourself wondering how to set up automations that were based around another home device condition. For instance, “When the TV turns on, turn off the reading lights.” The secret is using Google Home household routines instead of personal routines.

What triggers you can use with Google Home personal automations

Personal automations are a great way to get into basic routines and allow for four different criteria as a trigger for automations: 

• “When you use a specific phrase to Google Assistant”: You can set multiple options and variants for this, which is really useful. You should almost always set a verbal cue like this in addition to any other triggers, so you can run an automation on the fly if you need to. 

• “A specific time of day”: On whatever days of the week you choose. 

• “Sunrise or sunset”: You can offset this trigger by as much time before or after as you’d like. For example, “Run this routine three hours before sunrise on Monday, Wednesday, and Friday.”

• “When you arrive or leave a specific location”: Google uses your phone’s location to determine this, which is most useful with home- and work-related automations.

How to use set up a Google Automation using a device condition as a trigger

By selecting “Household” routine instead of “Personal” routine when setting up a new automation, you are given an additional trigger possibility called “When a device does something.”  If you click on that trigger condition and open it up, you should see every device connected to Google Home and a limited set of conditions related to each device. For instance, lights and plugs have “on” and “off” conditions, usually. Some lights might have dimness and color options as well. A thermostat or thermometer will likely have temperature as an option. Speakers might have volume as options. You can explore these options to set conditions that will trigger additional actions.

Set up an easy device trigger

I’ve read a number of arguments that a night light is the perfect example of an automation. Let’s say you have a motion or presence sensor in your hallway and a nightlight or dimmable light in that same hallway. You can now tell Google Home, “When the sensor senses someone, turn the hallway light on at 10%.” You can narrow it down to a time of day and specific days of the week. So, “When the sensor senses someone between the hours of 10 p.m. and 6 a.m., turn the hallway lights on at 10%,” which would stop Google Home from dimming your lights during the day.

Some rules to remember when setting up automations

This is a really powerful use of automations, but you have to keep in mind a few rules. It requires that all the devices in question are connected to Google Home, which means the device itself needs to have smart feature, or perhaps is connected to a smart plug. It also means that if you remove a device or it goes offline, the automation won’t work. Lastly, because these devices are powered by wifi and electricity, if your wifi goes down, the automations don’t run. That may not seem like a big deal, since lights can’t turn on without electricity anyway, but let me present a scenario: Let’s say I have a sump pump that’s powered by an automation and the wifi goes off for a period of time. That could be problematic and you couldn’t solve the problem with more smart tech (like a leak detector) since the problem is your wifi. All the while, water is still pooling but not being pumped out. These are important to keep in mind if you’re using automations while out of town, for instance. 

All in all, automations are still a brilliant way to help make your life more efficient and comfortable and to make your home more accessible. Just keep in mind the technology’s limitations to avoid over-reliance.

Source: LifeHacker – Use ‘Household’ Automations to Make Your Google Home Even Smarter

We’re all going to die, and before that, we will probably navigate the deaths of several people we love along the way.

Too dark? Discomfort with the idea of death may be the reason that people rarely talk about it, plan for it, or teach each other how to cope with it.

“Many people in our society are death phobic and do not want to talk about it,” said Marady Duran, a social worker, doula, and educator with the International End-of-Life Doula Association. “Being an end-of-life doula has been so much more than just my bedside experiences. I am able to talk with friends, family, and strangers about death and what scares them or what plans they have. Being a doula is also about educating our communities that there are many options for how end-of-life decisions can be made.”

When you or a loved one inevitably faces death, there can be an overwhelming feeling of What do I do now? What do I do with these feelings… and all this paperwork? End-of-life doulas (also called death doulas or death coaches) are compassionate and knowledgeable guides who can walk with you through death and grief.

The experience of supporting a childhood friend through her death at the age of 27 motivated Ashley Johnson, president of the National End-of-life Doula Alliance, to commit herself to this role.

“Walking alongside her during her journey, I recognized the tremendous need for education, service, and companionship for individuals and their families facing end-of-life challenges,” Johnson said. “The passing of my dear friend only solidified my commitment to this path. I saw it as my calling to extend the same level of care and support to others who were navigating the complexities of end-of-life experiences. I firmly believe that every individual deserves the dignity of a well-supported end-of-life journey, and that starts with demystifying the process, reducing fear, and helping families achieve the proper closure they need to heal.”

What to expect from a death doula

The services provided by an end-of-life doula are actually pretty varied and flexible. Much like birth doulas, they do not provide any medical care. These are some of the services Johnson said she provides in her work:

• Advance health care planning. This might include a living will, setting up durable power of attorney for health care, and advance directive decisions. “We help individuals and their families navigate the complex process of advance healthcare planning, ensuring their wishes and choices are respected and documented,” Johnson said.

• Practical training for family caregivers. End-of-life doulas can teach caretakers and family members how to physically care for their loved ones as they near death.

• Companionship to patients. “We provide emotional support and companionship to patients, helping to ease their feelings of isolation and anxiety,” Johnson said.

• Relief for family caregivers. Caring for a dying family member can be relentless, but caregivers need time to step away and care for themselves too.

• Creating a plan for support at the patient’s time of death. A person nearing the end of their life may be comforted by many things in their environment, from the lighting, music, aromatherapy, and who’s present. A doula can help coordinate all the details.

• Grief support. “Our role extends into the grieving process, offering support to both the dying person’s loved ones and the patient during the end-of-life journey and beyond,” Johnson said.

• Vigil presence for actively dying patients. “We ensure that no one faces the end of life alone by being a comforting and compassionate presence during the active dying process,”Johnson said.

• Help with planning funeral and memorial services. Planning services is a complicated task to tackle while you are likely exhausted with grief. Doulas have been through this process many times and can be a steady hand while you make decisions.

“Our aim as death doulas is to enhance the quality of life and death for all involved,” Johnson said. “We provide a range of non-medical support, fostering an environment where individuals and their loved ones can find comfort, guidance, and a sense of peace during this profound and delicate phase of life.”

When is it time to bring in a doula?

Death doulas can provide comfort and support to both the dying person and their loved ones at any stage of the process. They can step in to help before, during, or after a death.

• At any time, before you even receive a terminal diagnosis, doulas can help you prepare emotionally and practically with planning for end-of-life wishes, advance care planning, and creating a supportive environment.

• During the end-of-life phase, doulas are more present to offer emotional, spiritual and practical support. They may be available weekly or daily, as needed.

• After death, doula services continue for the family of the deceased.

“There really is no timeline for grief,” Duran said. “Some will want to meet one or two times after the death, and some do not want to do grief work at all. It is a personal journey, and some people may take years to do the work.”

Support for an unexpected death

Not all deaths come with an advanced warning or time to prepare and plan. Even in the case of an unexpected death, an end-of-life doula can help you handle practical details and process grief. They can:

• Provide emotional support

• Help you understand the grief process

• Teach you coping strategies

• Help with arrangements, legal, and financial matters

• Help you create meaningful memorial rituals to honor the deceased

• Provide connection and community

• Listen and validate your feelings

• Provide long-term support

“My mentor Ocean Phillips, who is also a doula, always reminds me that ‘grief is another form of love,’” Duran said. “Grief gets a bad rap, and many people do not want to feel grief, but it can be transformative for many who experience it. People who go through an unexpected death of a loved one may feel guilt—‘If only I…I could have…’ The doula can hold space for them and allow them to share that. We can never fix or change, but we can stand with them and provide loving kindness along the way.”

Other professionals to help you navigate a death

Death doulas work in conjunction with many other professionals, including healthcare workers and hospice staff, to help families go through the process of death and all that follows.

“The whole team has a piece in being able to connect with those navigating grief and death. I always recognize that I am just one small part of the larger community that will help support those facing death and loss,” Duran said.

These are a few other professionals you might want to reach out to when facing the death of a loved one:

• Grief counselor 

• Social worker

• Chaplain

• Community leaders

• Estate planning lawyer

• Probate lawyer

• Funeral service professional

• Financial planner

• Tax accountant (to help you file on behalf of the deceased and the estate)

• Estate liquidator or clean out-service.

Source: LifeHacker – Why You Should Consider a Death Doula

Aging in place, or staying in one’s own familiar home environment during the later years of life, is often beneficial to people with dementia. However, as dementia progresses, their home may not be perfectly suited to your loved one’s needs.

Healthcare designer Barbara J. Huelat shared some solutions for modifying a home environment to improve safety and comfort for a loved one with dementia. Huelat has spent her career implementing design principles that support healing, comfort, and safety. Through her personal experience, she has a special interest in environments that support people with dementia and their caregivers. Huelat recently collaborated with her daughter Sharon T. Pochron to write Taming the Chaos of Dementia: A Caregiver’s Guide to Interventions That Make a Difference.

“Science shows that as dementia sufferers lose their cognitive functions, they do not lose their ability to enjoy life, love and be loved, laugh, cry, and connect with relationships,” Huelat and Pochron wrote.

The principles of home design for dementia

Two key ideas to keep in mind when creating a home environment for someone with dementia are

1. Support physical needs.

2. Engage positive emotions.

“Create a safe and comfortable environment. This includes making sure that the home is well-lit, free of clutter, and easy to navigate. It is also important to remove any potential hazards, such as sharp objects or tripping hazards,” Huelat said.

Maximize natural light

Keep windows clean and curtains open in the day time to maximize the natural light in living areas.

“Natural light is important to people living with dementia because the older eye needs more light to see,” Huelat said. “And when you add dementia on top of age it becomes even more important.”

People with dementia need three times as much light as someone with normal vision. “This is important because people with dementia can get scared or confused when they can’t see something properly,” Huelat said.

Avoid shadows and glare

You may need to use higher-wattage light bulbs and additional lamps to brighten spaces for an older person. To avoid glare from the extra light, use warm white bulbs, indirect light sources, and remove reflective surfaces.

“Glare creates shapes, and people with dementia can’t figure out what they are. This becomes scary at night for people with dementia when they think they see something that isn’t really there,” Huelat said.

Also, be aware of shadows cast by the movement of ceiling fans—they can be confusing and frightening to a person with dementia.

Reduce mirrors

A mirror over the bathroom sink is useful and expected, but consider removing mirrors in other parts of the house.

“Reflective surfaces such as mirrors, windows, and glass doors, which might present distressing or unrecognizable images, provide common triggers,” Huelat wrote in her book. “Try using mirrors only over sinks or in grooming areas that often make sense to those with dementia—avoiding mirrors that can be seen from a distance or while walking, which can present images that are harder to understand.”

Remember, windows become reflective at night and can cause confusion. Once you’ve enjoyed the day’s natural light, close curtains at night.

Consider ergonomics

As dementia progresses, people become less mobile and will likely spend most of their time in a favorite chair. You can help make sure that chair is not only a comfortable favorite but also provides support for correct posture.

“Ergonomics is not only about comfort, it is also about maintaining working organs,” Huelat said. “If you see slouching, get pillows under their arm or back. Slouching can lead to respiratory problems. Good posture is essential to keep internal organs working.”

Look for these signs that a chair is a good ergonomic fit:

• Upright posture

• Lumbar support

• Neck is relaxed and neutral.

• Feet are flat on the floor.

• Arms rest parallel to the floor.

An ideal chair setup will give them a sightline to the door, the bathroom, a window, and the television. Put an appropriate table with task lighting within reach.

Check safety sooner rather than later

If the home needs structural changes to make it more accessible for someone with limited mobility (which a person with dementia will very likely face eventually), it’s better to do those modifications before the need arises.

As Huelat writes, you should evaluate these parts of the house in terms of avoiding falls, making falls less dangerous, and improving access to the kitchen, bathroom, and bedroom:

• Install a ramp to avoid steps at the home’s entry.

• Move furniture or clutter to clear paths through the home.

• Replace tub with a walk-in shower.

• Add a bench and removable shower head to the shower or tub.

• Install safety bars in the shower and next to the toilet and sink.

• Consider if a person with a walker or wheelchair could easily move through doorways or around the kitchen.

• Opt for carpet with a shorter pile, and avoid loose rugs.

• Avoid hard stone floors.

Connect with nature

Spending time in nature is good health advice for everyone and equally important for people with dementia.

“Getting out in nature, especially in the morning, can reset someone’s bio clock and circadian rhythm,” Huelat said. “Even if they are bedridden or can’t walk very far, try to maintain visuals with a window, sit them out on the porch or the deck, a short walk can do wonders.”

If your person is not mobile enough to actually go outside or they are prone to wandering, here are some tips for dialing up nature inside their safe spaces:

• Place indoor plants in the room.

• Use water elements like rain chains outside nearby windows, an aquarium, or an indoor tabletop fountain.

• Open windows for fresh air.

• Make sure outdoor views through windows are unobscured.

• Add window box plantings.

• Place bird feeders within eyesight.

• Offer your loved one binoculars to get a better look through windows.

• Encourage connecting with pets or service animals.

Honor cherished items and memories

Finally, an important part of making home enjoyable for a person with memory loss is to spotlight items that stimulate nostalgia or bring them comfort. You can do this by hanging their favorite art and photos where they spend most of their time. Keep a photo album and a memory box containing items from their past within reach.

“When your person with dementia is living at home, you might think you don’t need to lean on the power of items to generate feelings of safety and a connection to others, but if your person loses mobility and becomes less able to access trickier parts of the house, perhaps consider how this shrinking of their world impacts their sense of home and its associated safety,” Huelat wrote. “You might want to move favorite photos or memorabilia from the upstairs office to the bedroom or living room if your person can no longer access the office. If you find yourself needing to move bedrooms to avoid stairs, you can minimize confusion by bringing art and other objects specific to your person.”

Source: LifeHacker – How to Design the Best Home Environment for Someone With Dementia

Nearly two-thirds of parents report that their child is insecure about some element of their appearance, according to the C.S. Mott Children’s Hospital National Poll on Children’s Health at the University of Michigan Health. To add to that, one in five parents say their teens dislike being in photos because they’re too self-conscious.

“Children begin forming opinions about their bodies and looks at a very young age,” says Dr. Susan Woolford, a pediatrician at the University of Michigan Health C.S. Mott Children’s Hospital.

While it might be easy to attribute a child’s negative views of their appearance to social media, it’s just as likely to stem from interactions with peers, strangers, or family members. But how can parents promote body positivity in their children? We offer some simple things you can do to help kids avoid becoming self-conscious and embrace who they are.

Do they seem pessimistic or preoccupied about themselves?

While retailers are moving toward body diversity and positivity in their advertising, Woolford says there are some red flags parents can look out for if their child is preoccupied with or has a negative outlook regarding their appearance. Behaviors can include constantly talking about how they look, suddenly trying fad diets, or excessively exercising.

“We looked at things like not wanting to be in photographs,” she says. “Some children may not want to be in certain social settings or attend events. If it appears to be taking a toll on their quality of life or self-esteem, it may lead parents to take action.”

Help children develop a critical eye toward media

It’s one thing to know what your child engages with online, but how are they processing this content? Woolford recommends helping your child develop a critical eye toward what they see in all media, including social media. For example, several years ago, Dove ran an advertising campaign showing the work and manipulation it takes to create a billboard ad. It can be a starting point for a more extended conversation. You can also start by asking your child: “Can these images be achieved in a healthy way?” “Has this been distorted in some way?” “Who is this for?”

“Parents can teach their children to be media literate and savvy so they understand that these portrayals of the perfect body, face, and look in advertisements, media, and even from their own friends doesn’t reflect reality,” Woolford says.

Social media isn’t the lone culprit

Concerned parents and social observers were worried about the effects of difficult-to-attain beauty standards long before the advent of Instagram, TikTok, and other social media platforms. Many parents who participated in the national poll reported that real-life interactions have a more significant impact than social media on their child’s self-view. Woolford recommends parents speak with any children, strangers, or other family members who reinforce a negative body image in their children.

Shift their motivation

Advertisements for diet and exercise programs and products tend to focus on how their services can make you look rather than how you’ll feel when you’re done. Woolford says parents shouldn’t emphasize on lowering the number on the scale but rather how better food and more exercise can help improve your health.

She also believes that the conversation about meals should be shaped similarly, as fruits, vegetables, and other foods provide all the vitamins and minerals we need for every organ to work well.

“The reasons for having a healthy weight are not because of how we look or the clothes we wear,” she explains. “It’s because we are likely to be working better. Vessels will likely stay nice, open, and clear so blood can flow through them. Our lungs are functioning well. Our hearts are functioning well. I think we have to reshape this conversation around food and activity so that it is completely about helping our bodies to work optimally.”

Negative feelings about appearance aren’t limited to gender

When Woolford began the poll, she thought the issues it tackled were mainly for girls. However, the data revealed something surprising.

“While the data suggests that a greater percentage of parents of girls noted that the child had a concern, the percentage for boys was quite substantial,” she says.

Children of both genders between the ages of 8 and 18 tend to be self-conscious about their weight, skin, hair, teeth, height, and some of their facial features, making males just as vulnerable to depression, eating disorders, and low self-esteem.

Remind children that this isn’t forever

A child’s body changes rapidly because of puberty, which means that the aspects of their appearance that children tend to focus on will eventually disappear. Woolford suggests that parents show children what they looked like growing up so they can see that issues with their skin and teeth are just a phase.

“Parents can acknowledge that we all feel slightly uncomfortable about something,” she says. “But it doesn’t define us and impact our self-esteem or self-worth.”

Source: LifeHacker – How to Raise Kids Who Aren’t Self-Conscious About Their Appearance

Maybe you’ve noticed your child doing repetitive behaviors or being overly concerned with safety—and wondered if it’s more than a personality quirk. Because obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD) can start in childhood, it’s important to be aware of the signs.

Experts estimate that about 1 in 200 children have OCD. OCD can show up at any age, but symptoms will generally start to arise between the ages of eight and 12 or during the late teen to young adult years.

According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), “Children may have an obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) when unwanted thoughts, and the behaviors they feel they must do because of the thoughts, happen frequently, take up a lot of time (more than an hour a day), interfere with their activities, or make them very upset. The thoughts are called obsessions. The behaviors are called compulsions.”

Symptoms of OCD in childhood

The CDC and Child Mind Institute says there are common ways OCD can manifest for children.

Common obsessions

• Unwanted thoughts, impulses, or images that occur repeatedly, causing anxiety or distress

• Fear of contamination from germs, waste, vomit, chemicals, etc

• A need to make things even or symmetrical

• Extreme worry about safety, like potential accidents, fires, or someone getting hurt

• Fear they might do something violent or terrible

Common compulsions

• Repeated hand washing (beyond normal hygiene for preventing spread of germs)

• Locking doors or checking switches a certain number of times

• Lining up objects or touching parts of their bodies symmetrically, like scratching both ears or squeezing both fists

• Counting a certain number of times or repeating something mentally

• Repeating actions according to certain rules, thinking if they do them “right” the obsession will go away or they will be safe

• Repeatedly asking for reassurance that something bad isn’t going to happen

Clinical psychologist Dr. Jenny Yip began dealing with her own OCD as a child. Now she helps others living with OCD and anxiety.

“OCD can occur at any age. It most commonly shows up around 8 to 12 years old. However, in my practice, we’ve had kids who are much, much younger, who are 3 or 4, with full-blown OCD,” Yip said. “Tantrums are likely to show up with younger kids, while as kids get older, signs of OCD might be argumentative or oppositional behavior and aggressiveness.”

“Look for any type of repetitive behaviors or clinginess. Asking the same questions in a million different ways to get reassurance that everything will be okay or that something is safe. This may be because your child is afraid of harm, terrible outcomes of strangers, or anything that is unfamiliar to them,” Yip said. “If they have certain rules that seem very unnecessary or excessive, that demand that things have to happen in a certain way or with certain people. Also, tantrums. If you see a lot of tantrums — not because you won’t buy them candy — but because certain idiosyncratic rules are not being followed.”

What’s normal and what’s cause for concern?

Most children go through phases of mild idiosyncrasy as they develop. Temporary quirks, behaviors, or preoccupations may not be worrisome.

“If something gets prolonged and worsens, then it’s time to seek professional help. Any time behavior is debilitating or interferes with functioning, whether it’s social, academic, sports, or family, then it’s time to seek a professional,” Yip said.

Impact and challenges of childhood OCD

OCD can affect a child’s social interactions and performance in school. “Your child’s attention is being consumed by the intrusive thought, and therefore, you have no ability to focus on whatever the task is at hand,” Yip said.

OCD may be focused around certain people, places, or situations, Yip said, causing a child to avoid the triggering cause. “For example, if the OCD symptoms involve peers, your child will want to avoid school, teachers, and peers. If it’s a fear of contamination, it could be everything. If it’s checking, and your child is constantly checking their shoelaces, buttons, pencils, or schoolwork, that’s going to interfere with whatever task it is that requires that behavior.”

Children who have OCD may also have tic disorders (like Tourette syndrome), anxiety, depression, or disruptive behaviors. Parenting a child with OCD comes with its own challenges.

“Our natural inclination is to nurture and comfort our children. However, when it comes to OCD, there’s a fine boundary between supporting your child without supporting OCD,” Yip said. “It’s the opposite of what our natural inclination is, and that is the biggest struggle.”

How to get help

Childhood OCD can be treated with cognitive behavior therapy and sometimes medication. The CDC says it’s important for both families and schools to be involved in the therapy process, helping children manage stress and be supportive without unintentionally making the obsessions and compulsions worse.

“Make sure you find a therapist who has successful experience treating OCD from an evidence-based treatment method, which is exposure therapy. Additionally, when it comes to working with young children, make sure your therapist takes the approach of including any involved family members as part of treatment,” Yip said. “When it comes to children, OCD doesn’t just affect the child. OCD affects the entire family, and therefore, treatment needs to involve the entire family.”

If you think your child is showing signs of OCD, look for a therapist who can teach both of you how to cope with symptoms. The CDC recommends these resources:

• Psychologist Locator (a service of the American Psychological Association Practice Organization).

• Child and Adolescent Psychiatrist Finder (by the American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry).

• Find a Cognitive Behavioral Therapist (a search tool by the Association for Behavioral and Cognitive Therapies).

• FindTreatment.gov (a resource for finding treatment facilities).

“Your job as a parent is to prepare your child for real life, and a lot of that means helping your child build the tolerance and resiliency to do challenging things, such as defeating their OCD,” Yip said. “As a parent, it’s really hard to see your child suffer, but if you placate your child, you’re not placating your child, you’re placating their OCD, which will only empower OCD instead of your child.”

Source: LifeHacker – How to Recognize the Signs of Childhood OCD (and Get Help)

I am a well-documented maker and eater of grits, and have run the gamut of preparations, from the lowest of low-brow to truly homemade. I’ve made silly grits from Smartfood popcorn, and I’ve gone as DIY as you can without growing the corn myself, including transforming corn into hominy through a process known as “nixtamalization.” You can trust my opinion on the hot, corn-based porridge, and it is my opinion that you would stir a whole, raw egg into your next bowl.

Similar to tamago kake gohan, a Japanese breakfast dish consisting of hot rice, a raw egg, and some soy sauce and other seasonings, the hot grits gently “cook” the egg, turning the slippery white and runny yolk into a creamy, emulsifying sauce. It doesn’t taste like egg, not really, but it makes the grits taste richer, with a more cohesive, rib-sticking texture. It’s also an easy way to sneak a little more protein in there—six grams per egg—and I’ve found it amplifies the cheesiness of cheese grits, without adding any extra dairy.

There’s no need to temper the egg

Eggs are sometimes used to thicken soups like avgolemono, a chicken and rice soup flavored with lemon and dill. It’s thick and silky, but the egg has to be introduced gently, to keep it from scrambling when it hits the hot liquid. But just as with tamago kake gohan, you don’t need to worry about all that. Remove the grits from the burner, and the temp will drop just enough. The egg will lose its raw, gooey qualities, without seizing up into curds. Just prepare your grits according to the package instructions (or according to my elaborate recipe), pull them off the burner, and crack an egg right in the pot, stirring rapidly until it is completely mixed in, and no goopy white remains. Season with salt and pepper, and finish with an extra egg yolk, because you deserve a little mundane decadence.

Source: LifeHacker – You Should Add a Raw Egg to Your Grits

Anyone who’s tried to get anyone under eight years old ready for school knows that children have no concept of time. That might have to do with the fact that many kids, even my second grader, still struggle with reading an analog clock.

When I attempt to teach my son, I realize the mathematical ideas behind telling time with a little and a big hand are actually complex. It makes me wonder how I ever figured it out.

To help caregivers in a similar situation, we’ll outline the basic concepts of reading an analog clock, as digital clocks and smartphones may have put many of us out of practice. We’ll also share some fun ideas for how to teach the skill to kids.

Telling time on an analog clock

Each hour has 60 minutes, which, on most analog clocks, is represented by small lines around the clock. On every fifth line there is a number, beginning with one and ending with 12 on the top. These numbers represent the hours of the day.

All analog clocks have a short hand and a long hand. The short hand shows the hour, and the long hand points to the minutes that have passed in the hour. For example, if the large hand points at the 12 and the small hand at the 2, it is 2:00.

Things get tricky when the short hand moves closer to the next hour. For example, when the time is 2:50, the big hand is pointing at the 10, but the little hand is pointing closer to the 3, so kids might think the time is 3:50. If you want to quiz yourself or your child, click here for a short review.

Talk about your routine

One way to teach kids about time is to show them how its concepts apply to their daily lives. You can tell them they can play with a toy for five to 10 minutes and set a timer so they can understand how quickly (or slowly) time passes. You can also create index cards that list each step in their morning or evening routine. Have them put each one in order so they know when each step should happen and how long it should take.

Something that also works in my home is something I dubbed “Telling Time By Octonauts.” Whenever either of my children wants to know how long something will take, I put it in a concept they readily understand: screen time. For example, when asked how long it will be until dinner is ready, I explain it will take one Octonauts episode, which they know is around 22 minutes.

Give the short hand the hook

As stated above, telling time on an analog clock gets tricky as the short hand moves closer to the next hour. You can help show kids what hour it is by fashioning a pipe cleaner in a hook shape and attaching it to the hour hand. Even as it moves closer to the next hand, the pipe cleaner clearly shows that the short hand belongs to the previous hour, eliminating any confusion.

Pizza time

Many classrooms teach the time on an analog clock by cutting it up like a pizza, with each slice representing five minutes on the clock. Then, children can color each slice differently or draw in their favorite toppings. The slices will help them understand that the short hand doesn’t always point straight at the number of each hour but will be in the range of each slice.

Solve a time puzzle

Another fun way to teach time is with this cool puzzle set. Each puzzle has four simple pieces. On the largest piece, the time is written out numerically. Below it are three smaller pieces showing an analog clock and two time phrases (“it’s half past three”). After solving these 12 puzzles, kids will be able tell time before you know it.

Play Clock Bingo

Time is going to fly when you’re playing this game. The rules of Clock Bingo are simple: Kids get a sheet with various times drawn out. When the time is read, they mark it off their board. The first one to clear their board wins. You can even customize it to focus on hour, half-hour, or 15-minute intervals.

Source: LifeHacker – The Best Ways to Teach Your Kid to Tell Time

When it comes to economical ways to transform a room—or an entire house—you cannot beat paint. If you’re reasonably capable, you can DIY a paint job for a small amount of money and in a relatively short amount of time, and that new color on the walls can have a dramatic effect on a space. Paint can make a room feel newer, larger, and more welcoming.

If you pick the right color, that is. Choosing a paint color can be challenging, and just about everyone has had the experience of finishing up a paint job and realizing the color they chose—and just spent hours applying to the walls—just isn’t right. You can spend weeks staring at paint chips and brushing samples onto the walls and still hate the color. It’s one thing if you notice right away—you still have some easy options to adjust the shade of your paint. So what do you do if you’re out of vacation days and don’t have the extra budget (or extra energy) to start over and re-paint the room? You actually have more options than you think.

Adjust lighting

Color is light—more specifically, color is the perception of different wavelengths and frequencies of light. If you can’t stand the paint you just spent days applying to your walls, the first thing you should investigate is the lighting in the room. Try different lighting temperatures by swapping out bulbs, and change the position of lighting sources like lamps if you can. You can also try changing your lighting to be as close to natural light as possible. Adjustable bulbs that give you a range of temperatures can help you experiment with the right settings, and also allow you to create a dynamic lighting plan that changes with the light of the day.

Add more color

Like the lighting in your room, all the other colors can have an impact on your perception of the wall color. If you’ve ever seen an optical illusion involving color perception, you know how wildly different the same color can seem depending on the colors adjacent to it. So if you hate the color you’ve painted on your walls, try

• Adding an accent wall. Sure, this involves re-painting, but it’s only one wall. And choosing the right complementary color for an accent wall can make your other walls look dramatically different. You can also consider using wallpaper to create your accent wall, bringing in patterns that can have a variety of effects on your perception of the paint.

• Add decor. You can bring more color into the room with decor and trim. Bringing in more of the same color, or complementary colors from the same palette, can reinforce the color on your walls, tying it together better with the room and thus making it more attractive to your eye. Alternately, contrasting colors can have a similar transformative effect as the accent wall strategy, changing how the wall color looks.

Cover it up

Finally, if you absolutely hate the color and nothing you do seems to help but the idea of re-painting the room makes your teeth grind, you can cover it up with:

• Art. A lot of wall art can reduce the amount of the offending color you see. Paintings, photos, mirrors—get creative, and know that every piece you hang is a few more square feet of that color you won’t see.

• Furniture. Bookshelves, anyone? Placing big, tall furniture around the perimeter of the room will effectively hide the paint.

• Window treatments. Long curtains that go from floor to ceiling on your windows can both hide some of that paint and transform it a bit with a complementary or contrasting color.

• Texture. A kind of middle ground between doing nothing and re-painting the whole room, using a texture technique like sponging or ragging can add dimension and alter the shade of your wall color with a bit less effort than a total recoat.

Source: LifeHacker – How to Fix a Room When the Paint Color is All Wrong

From the preschool holiday program to an oral book report to high school musical auditions, kids are challenged throughout their school careers to perform before an audience. For many, it comes naturally, but others struggle with feelings of anxiety—classically known as stage fright.

“Feeling self-conscious is fundamental to the human experience—as a profoundly social species, we have evolved through connectedness and interdependence with one another,” said Green Brooms Music Academy music teacher Sara Garcia. “Our earliest ancestors kept each other safe through cooperation and acceptance, and the primal desire for acceptance is a vestige of very real and immediate threats to a human’s safety outside of community.”

Though it’s natural to experience stage fright, children are encouraged to overcome it for the benefits of participating in the performing arts:

• Improved cognitive, social, and motor development.

• Practicing skills like improvisation and quick thinking.

• Exploring a wider range of emotions through performance.

• Building confidence and learning to manage anxiety.

Fortunately, you can help your reluctant star manage their stage fright and even grow their self-esteem through a public performance.

“Gradually facing a feared situation, what we know as exposure, is one of the most effective ways to overcome anxiety, fears, and phobias. It helps to desensitize, build a higher tolerance level, build confidence, and reduce the anxieties surrounding performing,” said licensed professional counselor Andrea R. Tarantella.

Clues your child might have stage fright

Tarantella noted children with stage fright might experience physical symptoms that are not immediately visible to parents, like stomachaches, nausea, racing heart, dizziness, and headache. But here are other signs you may see:

• Avoiding class presentations or playing in sports events

• Fidgeting

• Pacing

• Nail-biting

• Negative self talk about their abilities

• Expressing fear of embarrassment

“With stage fright, parents can expect to see their child experience physical symptoms of stress, show a heightened fear of being evaluated in some way by others, and struggle with memory or with concentrating during performances,” Tarantella said.

Tips to help with childhood stage fright

Music teacher Dana Vachharajani said first, parents should acknowledge that stage fright is real. “Sometimes as busy parents, we might chalk up stage fright to shyness or that our children don’t like an activity, but in reality, stage fright is a condition that needs to be approached with understanding and attention. The good news is there are lots of options to help alleviate symptoms,” she said.

Try these suggestions, from both Tarantella and Vachharajani:

• Continue to give your child opportunities for public performance with gradual exposure.

• Create a supportive environment so kids feel safe expressing their fears about performance.

• Celebrate every little success when they perform.

• Before a performance, encourage your child to practice in front of one family member or a few immediate family members. When they are comfortable, have them practice for someone less familiar.

According to Tarantella, avoid these reactions to your child’s stage fright:

• Dismissing the child’s feelings

• Forcing them into uncomfortable situations

• Comparing their child to others who don’t have stage fright

• Using criticism or guilt

• Ignoring the issue altogether

Also, depending on your child’s age, you may approach stage fright differently.

Helping your kids with stage fright in elementary school

Very young children may appear shy or cling to parents when it’s time to perform.

“In some situations, a child may struggle to emotionally regulate and have a tantrum or start to cry,” Tarantella said. “At the elementary school level, nervous habits begin to develop like fidgeting, biting their nails, or twirling their hair.”

You may need to get teachers’ and coaches’ support to help them build confidence.

“There might be times when your kind and patient support are enough and then there are going to be moments when we need a team,” Vachharajani said. “If stage fright is happening in school, please let the teacher know to start small with the activities in class that are public facing. Discuss with coaches, dance teachers, and other trusted people in their lives.”

Helping your kids with stage fright in middle school

Tweens and teens are known for their self-consciousness, comparing themselves to peers, and growing concerns about social status.

“Around these ages, stage fright can look a lot like avoidance and/or defiance if they are so anxious that they’ll defy an authority figure or get a bad grade to prevent them from having to perform,” Tarantella said.

Vachharajani suggests these tips for helping a reluctant middle schooler:

• Don’t push too hard. Pressure and long discussions about stage fright may cause them to shut down.

• Recognize it can take some children years to be comfortable with public performance as they work through their emotions about it.

“Stage fright doesn’t disappear overnight or after the first successful presentation,” she said. “We have to be aware that this might manifest itself in other situations. Be supportive and start with simple steps.”

Helping your kids with stage fright in high school

In high school, parents may need to back off and let teens explore their independence when it comes to public performance. However, you can always be available to support them when they show signs of performance anxiety and help them set realistic goals.

Vachharajani suggests using the power of non-verbal affirmations.

“If it’s performance time and there are still some lingering jitters, have them visualize a calm place for them or create a phrase to have them repeat in their mind. If they don’t know where to focus during a performance, choose a comfort focal point they can see. Let your child know where you will be so that they can see you in the audience. If this isn’t possible, have them find a focal point above the heads of the crowd, so that they don’t have to look at faces,” she said.

What if it’s more than just stage fright?

Mild stage fright is temporary nervousness that goes away after the impending performance. Moderate stage fright may include more noticeable symptoms like sweating, racing heart, trembling, and making mistakes. Even then, Tarantella said, there should be no lasting distress after the performance is over.

How can you tell if your child’s level of performance anxiety goes beyond that, and they need professional counseling to help?

“Severe and potentially diagnosable levels of stage fright are when parents will want to be sure that they seek professional help to prevent further impairment and interference in their child’s academic, social and emotional well-being,” Tarantella said. “At this level, parents may see their children struggle with panic attacks, severe self-doubt, intense fear, and avoidance of the performance situation. At this level, parents may notice this anxiety is significantly debilitating, impacting their ability to perform, and also persists over time.”

Source: LifeHacker – An Age-by-Age Guide to Helping Your Kid Get Over Stage Fright

Old, outdated wallpaper can be a frustrating challenge to tackle. It takes some doing to get it all off, and if you don’t have the right tools, wallpaper removal can mean endless scraping, shreds of old paper clinging to the walls, and mediocre results in the end. But there is a way to get that old paper off the walls once and for all and make your walls look like new again.

For this project, you’ll need: 

• A wallpaper scoring tool

• A drop cloth

• A spray bottle

• Some wallpaper stripper

• A scraping tool

• A sponge

• Some sandpaper

Gloves and a bucket will also come in handy.

What to prepare before removing wallpaper

Pull all your furniture away from the wall and turn off the power to the lights and outlets in the room you’re working on to protect them as well as avoid the danger of shock if the outlet or light circuits get wet. Cover outlets and switches with plastic or tape, and then put down a drop cloth to protect the floor.

Before you start, check what kind of wallpaper you have. If it’s peel-able, you need to peel off the top layer of the paper, and you don’t need to score it before dousing it with stripper. If it’s removable, you can skip all the other steps and just peel it off the wall, using a little bit of the stripper if you have stubborn sticky spots. For peel-and-stick, you’ll have to see if it will come off in larger pieces. If it’s been up for a while, you might need to treat it the way you would treat other types of wallpaper because heat and damage to the surface can make it difficult to peel. If it’s vinyl or paper, follow the steps for removal.

How to score and strip wallpaper

Next, you can score the surface of the wallpaper by running the wallpaper scoring tool over the wall, puncturing the paper to allow the stripper to seep through. Make sure to get as far into the nooks and crannies as you can to avoid leaving paper clinging to the corners of the room, making it hard to remove. If your tool doesn’t reach the corners, you can use a utility knife or even a fork to get in there and make a few punctures in the paper.

Once the surface is scored all over, spray your stripper onto the wall, making sure not to get too much on other nearby surfaces in the process. If you prefer a less harsh method, mixing one part white vinegar with three parts water can work with some types of wallpaper.

The solution should be allowed to soak in for about an hour. To test to see if it’s time to peel, try pulling up a corner. If it comes away easily, you can start removing. If not, wait a few more minutes or add some more stripper if your wallpaper hasn’t been fully soaked. If the stripper is working, you should see the wallpaper start to wrinkle and pull away from the wall in some places.

Once the paste begins to let go, peel the paper away from the wall by hand as much as you can. Use your scraping tool to work on areas where the glue might be a bit thicker. The paper should come off fairly easily now, but if you’re still encountering areas where it’s still firmly stuck, you can douse it again with the stripper and scrape again.

Next, any remnants of the glue or smaller shreds can be scrubbed off with a sponge and some stripper. Using the rough side of the sponge can help get the stickier globs of glue off of the wall. You might need to repeat this part of the process a few times to get all of the glue off the wall.

What to do after removing wallpaper

Last, once the wall is dry, you can use some sandpaper to scrub away any tiny bits of paper or rough patches left behind. You should only do this step if you have walls that are newer than 1978, though. If they’re older, you need to assume there’s lead in the paint and avoid creating dust that can enter your body through your lungs.

Once your walls are smooth, apply a primer to even out the color of the wall and seal it before proceeding to the new wallpaper or paint. Just make sure everything is fully dry before putting a coat of primer on the wall so the paint will dry evenly without streaking.

Source: LifeHacker – The Best Way to Remove Old Wallpaper

If you’re curious about choking during sex, you’re not alone. A 2020 national probability survey of Americans aged 18 to 60 years found that 21% of women reported having been choked during sex with 20% of men reporting they had choked a partner during sex. With “Choke Me Daddy” memes making the rounds on social media and beyond, it’s not surprising that the survey also found that adults aged 18 to 29 engage in choking at much higher rates than older adults.

Although choking, also known as erotic asphyxiation, might heighten curiosity and arousal for some, it’s not without its risks. Here’s what you need to know to ensure your safety and have a good time.

Why would someone want to be choked during sex?

“Choking, erotic asphyxiation, or—as it’s known in the kink community—breath play, is an activity in which a partner (or oneself, as in autoerotic asphyxiation) restricts the airflow of someone’s breathing by adding pressure around their throat and windpipe,” says Lisa Finn, Babeland’s sex educator.

Finn says choking can be really hot for a number of the same reasons that any more “risky” form of play, especially BDSM play, can be.

“There’s the adrenaline of the danger behind it, pain for pleasure, the physical sensation of pressure and lightheadedness, and the sort of primal and aggressive energy of being handled in a more assertive way,” she says. “One of the biggest appeals of choking we hear about is the exchange of power. The emotional and physical aspect of taking control over or surrendering and having a release from control with something that could really hurt (or even kill) and the trust and intimacy that goes with that.”

When it comes to the physical effects of choking, Finn says the sensation of being choked sends a spike of adrenaline through our system and “kicks the sympathetic nervous system (aka, the danger response, like fight or flight) into gear. Paired with the high-like lightheadedness and an already heightened state from arousal, this can have effects like added intensity or even a sort of euphoric sensation to orgasm.”

What are the risks of being choked during sex?

While it might be considered erotic by some, choking during sex can also be lethal with autoerotic asphyxia being estimated to cause 250-1,000 deaths per year in the United States.

“Choking is extremely dangerous, and if you don’t do it correctly, you can give someone permanent brain damage or even kill them,” says sexologist Marla Renee Stewart, sexpert for Lovers sexual wellness brand and retailer.

That is why she highly suggests taking a class on choking to ensure that your lover is safe and that you are utilizing correct techniques.

“It is considered Edge Play for a reason,” Stewart says. “You need to decide if you want to do an air choke or a blood choke. I highly suggest the former because it is easier for people who are new to kink and it’s really about the restriction of breath, rather than restriction of blood flow to the brain. With a blood choke you can squeeze the very important interior and exterior jugular veins. So this is why I think this kind of choking should only be reserved for those who are familiar with extreme play and the safety precautions necessary. You also need to have safety guards in place such as safe words, gestures, and knowledge around warning signs that you are harming someone.”

For someone who has experienced trauma and wants to introduce choking into their sex life, Stewart recommends going to a kink-aware and trauma-informed coach, therapist, or counselor first and then going to someone who is experienced at using kink to transform the trauma in people’s lives. Ideally, she says it would be great if these were two different people to work together to “ensure that you are getting the care you need. In addition, making sure that you are educated about the various aspects of choking and knowing how to do it properly. I believe going slowly and integrating various aspects of choking is best and to do this over time.”

What are some important things people need to discuss before they introduce choking?

First and foremost, Finn says, scene negotiation and safety are essential, as they are with any BDSM acts, but especially one that can be as dangerous as breath play, which has some serious physical risks like injury, brain damage, or even death.

“There are emotional and mental risks to this kind of play as well,” she says. “Being choked without warning or discussion, feeling like the experience is one-sided, or any way of having breath play go outside of your boundaries can be terrifying and traumatic.”

Finn recommends taking the time to discuss this with your partner and knowing what it is about choking that turns you on is essential here, too. Are you into the physical sensation? Do you want your choking to be aggressive or tender? Is a “struggle” part of the dynamic of the roleplay, or is that a sign that something is wrong?

“Having misaligned expectations in any intense scene can lead to a less pleasurable or even downright uncomfortable experience, physically and emotionally,” Finn explains.

Second, Finn suggests making a safeword and a safe action (or “safe gesture”).

“A safeword is a word that you can call out that communicates the need for all action to stop for any reason, and is especially important during intense play like this,” she says. “When you are choking your partner, you should not be reaching the point where they cannot speak. That’s a sign that you’ve passed a line of physical safety.”

However, if you or your partner get to that point of not speaking because of airflow obstruction or if there’s any other reason someone may be unable to clearly speak or clearly hear when a safeword is used (for example, if there’s loud music, if a partner may go non-verbal, if a partner is hard of hearing) it’s essential, she says, to have a safe action in addition to a safeword. Some examples for safe actions that Finn recommends include: squeaking a toy, dropping a set of keys, tapping your partner twice (“tapping out”), or raising an open palm in a “stop” gesture.

If your partner becomes non-responsive, it’s key to stop all play immediately and seek medical attention.

Source: LifeHacker – Is Choking During Sex Ever Really Safe?

No matter how much you love your home, after living in it for a while you’re bound to get a bit bored or dissatisfied with how it looks. But redecorating, renovating, and repairing a home can get pretty expensive. And if you don’t own your home, you’re not going to want to invest a lot of money into cosmetic changes. But there’s an answer that has probably never occurred to you: your local dollar store.

Dollar stores can be an amazing resource when you’re trying to save a little money, and home repairs and renovations are no exception. For a small amount of money, you can do a lot to freshen up your home.

Supplies

The first thing to realize is that the dollar store actually has many of the tools and supplies you’ll need for basic maintenance and home improvements. From tools like hammers and screwdrivers to caulk, duct tape, and paint supplies, if you’re trying to get something done around the house or need to fix a broken toilet or door lock for cheap, the dollar store is your answer.

The tools are obviously also made cheaply and won’t last, and you’re not going to be doing precision work with these materials. But if your goal is just to get a project done without having to donate plasma for extra cash, the dollar store will have what you need for basic projects.

Wall tiles

One of the most versatile things you can buy at a dollar store to improve your home is removable wall tiles. These peel-and-stick tiles can be stuck on any wall and will stand up to mild moisture, making them usable as kitchen backsplashes. They can be cut down and used on just about any vertical surface, in fact, and you can get them in many different styles, including some that mimic the look of tile.

Flooring

If you have a gnarly old floor that needs covering up—or warming up—you can source area rugs at any dollar store for $5 a pop. For more coverage, buy carpet mats to cover an entire floor, either as one style to create the illusion of a single carpet, or with a creative pattern created from different styles.

Floating storage

You can find fabric boxes, wicker baskets, and other storage solutions at any dollar store. You can also find Command strips or other fasteners that you can use to attach that storage to your walls, getting all your junk off the floor and onto attractive floating shelves or baskets.

Wallpaper

Like stick-on wall tiles, removable wallpaper can take a boring, plain wall or other vertical surface and jazz it up nicely. As long as you’re careful to line up the sheets accurately, the final result can look spectacular and can be peeled off whenever you need to. For example, you can make your stairs pop by applying some wallpaper to the risers, giving them some artistic dimension for just a few dollars and a few hours of work.

Mirror art

One of the simplest ways to create a striking piece of wall art is to pick up a few sets of cheap mirrors (like these hexagon mirrors, for example) and arrange them creatively on a wall. It’s super cheap and super simple, but the end result is both geometric and reflective, which is a lot of visual bang for very few bucks.

Window treatments

The surest sign that you’re a real live adult who does adult things is caring about your window treatments. Curtains can get pricey, but you can find them at your local dollar store for less than $20, along with the necessary hardware if your windows don’t already have it. You’ll be amazed at the transformation of your room.

Solar lighting

If you have an outdoor space or a small patio as part of your home, some cheap solar lights can make it much more usable after the sun has set. Without adding any extra burden to your electric bill, a few stake lights can make any outdoor area safer and easier to use. Plus, they can double as emergency lighting during blackouts.

Source: LifeHacker – 7 Home Improvement Projects You Can Source From the Dollar Store

If you own a home, you own an asset. In fact, it’s probably the largest asset you possess, which typically means that if you want to change homes you’ll need to sell your current house. After all, most of your cash is probably locked up in home equity, and your only options for accessing that are to borrow against it or sell.

But selling a house can be a lengthy process. If you desperately need to get your money out of a home—whether it’s to fund a new home purchase or to deal with some other financial challenge—you might be tempted to sell to an “instant buyer” or iBuyer. An iBuyer is a company that uses algorithms and other technologies to quickly estimate your home’s value and craft an offer on the property, usually within a day. You might recall that real estate site Zillow got itself into a lot of trouble when its iBuyer division went off the rails a few years ago. That debacle tamped down enthusiasm for iBuyers, but they still exist, and you can still sell your home to one. But you probably shouldn’t.

Advantages of iBuyers

So why would someone sell their house to a faceless corporation instead of some nice family that writes you warm letters about their future happiness in your home? The main advantage of selling to an iBuyer is speed: Instead of waiting weeks or months for an offer to come in (the average time it takes to sell a house is close to two months), you receive an offer within hours after filling out a form on their website. And iBuyers also typically close on the deal more quickly than traditional transactions.

So if the speed with which you’re paid is your absolute top priority, an iBuyer might make sense. iBuyers also work to make the whole process easy, so if you simply don’t have the bandwidth to handle the stress of selling your house, it can be tempting to click a few buttons and just let someone else determine everything. But you still probably shouldn’t.

Unreliable estimates

The first reason you shouldn’t use an iBuyer is because they will definitely boil that frog when it comes to the sale price. Once you fill out all the forms on their site, they will send you that instant offer based on their algorithm. Except that’s not a final offer. If you like it, they’ll conduct a physical inspection of your home, and if they decide it needs any repairs or their algo missed something, they will reduce the offer accordingly based on the estimated costs of those repairs.

And those estimates can be way off, reducing your profit on the sale—some iBuyers have even been fined by the Federal Trade Commission (FTC) for overcharging on repairs in order to reduce the sale price of properties.

Lowball prices, highball fees

And something else about the offer you’ll get from an iBuyer: It will almost certainly be less than what you could sell the house for with a little more patience. iBuyers underpay about 10-15% on average for the homes they purchase. You could think of that as a convenience fee for the speed and ease of the transaction, but that’s a significant chunk of cash that could be in your pocket instead of the iBuyer’s.

Using an iBuyer without a real estate agent also means you’re not paying a traditional Realtor fee, which is typically about 6% of the transaction. Instead, you pay an iBuyer a set of fees for their services, which in many cases can be equal to or even higher than a Realtor’s fees. And foregoing an agent when selling your house means you don’t have a local market expert to advise you, and you’ll have to rely totally on the iBuyer’s information. And if you do decide to use an agent while working with an iBuyer, now you’re paying at least twice the fees to sell your home.

Unless you absolutely must sell your home as quickly as possible, an iBuyer is always going to be an inferior choice. You’ll probably get a low price for your home, you won’t get any advice from a professional, and you’ll likely wind up paying the same fees—or more—as you would have if you’d gone the traditional route. If you can stand the waiting, avoid the iBuyers.

Source: LifeHacker – Why Selling Your Home to an iBuyer Is Almost Always a Bad Idea