Coming April 1st (and not as an April Fools’ joke), this is the Steamboat Willie set being released by LEGO ($90). The 791-piece set is entirely black and white and grey and includes “hidden wheels, moving steam pipes, rotating paddle wheels, adjustable crane and assorted elements including the ‘S.S. Willie’ boat name sign, ‘1928’ year sign and a ‘potato bin’. The boat’s bridge has space for a minifigure, a brick-built bell and assorted elements including the ship’s wheel and life buoy. The 2 steam pipes move up and down and the 2 paddle wheels rotate when the boat is pushed along.” That’s cool, I’m cool with all that. What I’m a little less cool with is the price tag. And what I’m not cool at all with? “All your coworkers and every roommate you’ve ever had, ever.” FACT. I’ve burned a lot of bridge in my life, and *sighing deeply* if I could go back and do it all over again, I never would have built those bridges in the first place, just catapulted flaming garbage across the river. “Wow — strong opinions, GW.” Thanks I’ve been working out.
Keep going for a bunch more shots.
Source: Geekologie – Cool: An All Black And White (And Grey) Official Steamboat Willie LEGO Set
This is a video of a female nunchucker giving us a brief taste of her skill with a short routine using light-up nunchucks, or lightchucks as they’re probably called but I was too lazy to Google and verify. Admittedly, I do kinda want some. And a disco ball in my living room. Of course I’ll need to have a living room again first, but these things come with time. “No, these things come with paying your rent so I wouldn’t have had to evict you.” Whatever, Mr. Landlord, why should I pay rent when you never even fixed the broken toilet? “The one you jump-kicked the tank off of and flooded the apartment because it ‘couldn’t handle a real turd’?” Yes, that’s the one.
Keep going for the video.
Source: Geekologie – Well I’m Impressed: Woman Performs Brief Routine With Light-Up Nunchucks
This is a video of a guy getting his first tattoo and wailing like a banshee in the process. AAAAAAAAAH! AAAAAAAAAAAAAH! MONICA! MONICA! I assume Monica is the very clearly embarrassed woman holding his toddler hand and questioning if she really wants her name on his arm after all. No word if this parlor charges extra for screaming, but they definitely should. Also no word what tattoo he was actually getting, but whatever it was the artist better have started changing it to ‘MOMMY’S LITTLE BOY’ as soon as the screaming began.
Keep going for the video (note: screaming) while I suggest maybe the face-painting booth at the fair is more his speed.
Source: Geekologie – Maybe Stick To Temporaries: Guy Screams Bloody Murder Getting His First Tattoo
This is Dogfish Head SuperEIGHT, a Gose beer developed in partnership with Kodak that has the perfect pH to develop Super 8 film (along with the other ingredients listed above). Some more info while I pour half on Old English forty on my laptop and complain Photoshop has stopped working:
This sessionable super Gose is brewed with eight heroic ingredients: prickly pear, mango, boysenberry, blackberry, raspberry, elderberry, kiwi juices, toasted quinoa and an ample addition of red Hawaiian sea salt! …These unique ingredients give this beer a vibrant red color, with delicious flavors of berries and watermelon, along with a tart – yet refreshing – finish. But that’s not all … it also effectively develops Kodak’s Super 8 film. From the can to the stop bath, there’s a whole lot of science and alternative processing that takes place to bring the imagery to life. And it’s so totally worth it..
But like, can I still drink the beer after developing my movie? Asking for a friend who already did but really can’t afford diarrhea on a Friday night. “Do you have a date, GW?” I said I was talking about a friend. “Friend, LOL.” Friend? DATE, LOL. I could really use a hug.
Keep going for a video of a trip to Philadelphia processed with the beer.
Source: Geekologie – Dogfish Head Brewery And Kodak Team Up To Develop A Beer That Can Develop Super8 Film
These are several shots of the conveniently shaped (I suppose most are) Zweibrücken Observatory of the Natural Science Association, which German professor Hubert Zitt, who’s “widely known for his fascinating lectures on Star Wars, Star Trek and other science fiction,” had successfully transformed into a giant R2-D2 with a fresh coat of paint. Obviously, we can only hope when the aliens finally land they come to R2 looking for answers instead of making the mistake of demanding to speak with any world leaders.
Keep going for a handful more shots.
Source: Geekologie – German Professor Gets Observatory Painted Like A Giant R2-D2
This is a video demonstration of the MIT Computer Science and Artificial Intelligence Lab’s ‘Magic Ball’ soft gripper robotic hand. It’s unique design allows it to pick up almost anything. Some more info while I try to figure out how the hell I can get one of these into a claw machine at the arcade:
The “Magic Ball” soft gripper uses an origami-inspired 3D printed silicon rubber skeleton inside that is very flexible. Over the top of that, the team used a balloon in some instances to create an airtight system that can contract under vacuum pressure. When the suction is applied, the gripper closes and has enough strength to lift 100 times its own weight.
Obviously, if you watched the video and imagined that thing trying to pick up your penis, you are not alone. Granted you’re not sitting with me at the non-pervert table, but I can assure you you’re not alone. Now if you’ll excuse yourself, I’d appreciate it if you ate your lunch elsewhere. And give me your tater tots. And your cinnamon roll. Oh cool you licked it. I don’t care I still want it, and, if we’re being completely honest, even more now.
Keep going for the full video of the future of robotic HJs.
Source: Geekologie – Vacuum Powered Origami Inspired Robotic Hand That Can Pick Up Any Shape Object
This is a video from Caringbah, New South Wales, Australia, of a man trying to stop his runaway boat by hanging onto the trailer coupler for dear life. Some more info while I keep hitting the sing button on my Big Mouth Billy Bass until a coworker threatens to fight me and I accept, but only if it’s with open staplers in our hands. First to land six staples in their opponent wins:
“After a huge day at work, Simmo rushed to pick up his beloved Trailcraft fishing boat from the marine mechanic before it closed. Exhausted he arrived home and was checking everything out. Having seen the mechanic used the trailer hand brake, he dismissed his usual routine of chain and chocks. The instant he released the chain the boat took off. Now, there was no way on earth he was going to lose his boat. So he held on for dear life, managing to steer it to safety. He came off worse for wear after kissing the bitumen, but his beloved boat respected his effort and is ready for the next fishing adventure.”
Ahahahaha, but was he really steering it? Maybe? And did he really stop it, or was that the curb? Whatever the case, I still admire this man’s commitment to being dragged across asphalt, and I could really use somebody like him to join my neighborhood stunt spectacular this year. Well sir — what do you say? “I’d rather be fishin’.” I hear you, but what if I told you several of your stunts will include A SHARK-FILLED POOL?! You sleep on it. Also probably on your left side for a while because I imagine the right looks like beef jerky right about now.
Keep going for the video.
Source: Geekologie – Man Gets Dragged Across Lawn, Driveway, Street Trying To Stop His Runaway Boat Trailer
This is the $30 Astronaut Lamp designed by Paladone and available from ThinkGeek. Sure it’s not the most realistic astronaut lamp I’ve ever seen (that moon isn’t even cheese and is completely out of proportion!) but it will still certainly add a little SPACE FLAVOR to any room. And you know how I feel about space flavor. “You love it even more than ranch.” Haha, well let’s not get crazy but yes it’s up there, top five at least. Now, as an accomplished space ranger myself, I’d now like to open the floor to space related questions. You sir — there with the hat. “I wasn’t raising my hand.” What’s it like making love in zero gravity? Good question. And let me tell you — way cooler than making love underwater. “Ursula?” Oh I’m sorry I thought you weren’t asking questions.
Keep going for one more shot with the lights on, a gif of the astronaut moonwalking, and a video unboxing from the company that makes it.
Source: Geekologie – I Am Into This: The Astronaut Spacewalk Lamp
This is a video of a cool aunt recording a birthday message for Marge (aka Large Marge In Charge — she must love that nickname) on her na-na-na-na-na-nineteenth birthday while parked at a strip mall, then proceeding to sing happy birthday and exit her parking space prior to finishing the message and immediately getting into an accident. Jesus, Marge, is that what you wished for — a fender bender? “Did you not hear my nickname? Besides, she videos and drives too much.” Valid. Really it’s just nice to know I’m not the only one who still makes shameful birthday wishes.
Keep going for the video.
Source: Geekologie – Woman Recording Video Birthday Message On Phone Pulls Out Of Parking Spot, Immediately Gets In Accident
This is a video of Pickle the rescue cat seemingly understanding and playing with a Newton’s Cradle desktop toy. Some more info from Pickle’s caretaker while I try to untangle all the balls on mine (I go absolutely nuts on that thing sometimes, like I’m trying to send a friend over the top bar of a swing set):
[Pickle] e has no front teeth so he is unable to keep his tongue inside his mouth making him even cuter. … Pickle did it all on his own and started playing with the Newton’s Cradle. At first, he was just trying to eat the balls and then realized when he lets go, it starts swinging. He then didn’t stop doing it and also started to pick up when he had done it wrong, as you can see in the video and stopped the swinging, trying again.
Admittedly, he does seem to know what he’s doing. Now I’m not saying this cat understands physics, but I’m also not saying I understand physics. Or any of the other sciences or math, although based on a series of Youtube videos I was watching last night at 4AM I am convinced there are at least 26 dimensions.
Keep going for the video (which does contain an f-bomb at 0:10 which I mistook for one of my own coworkers at first), and try to tell me that isn’t the face of a genius.
Source: Geekologie – Cat Plays With Newton’s Cradle Desktop Toy
These are several shots and a video of the LMV496 from French custom bike builder Lazareth. The highly questionable design (why does it look like there are giant strips cut out of the tires? And how come there isn’t any video of the thing flying untethered and not just hovering?) has an electric engine capable of a 100km range on the ground, and four wheels that splay out with a kerosene powered turbine in the center of each to take to the skies for up to 10 of the most terrifying minutes of your life at a time. Want one? Lazareth says they’ll produce a limited edition of five of the death traps for upwards of $550,000 apiece. Looking for the same thrill but find yourself a little short on the funds? Just ride your bicycle off the side of the Grand Canyon.
Keep going for the video (actual very unstable hovering footage is around 1:47, and LOUD) while I wait to pick up a used model for super cheap considering smashed and burnt scrap metal prices aren’t exactly through the roof.
Source: Geekologie – Motorcycle That Transforms Into A Jet-Powered Flying Machine
This is a video from Krasnoyarsk, Russia of the final round of what I can only assume is Russia’s premier face-slapping league of winner Vasiliy Kamotskiy (left) finally slapping enough sense into his opponent’s brain that it shuts down and he passes out to prevent another hit. Kamotskiy then takes home the grand prize of 30,000 rubles, which is *Googles conversion rate* around $470. Wait, what? A Russian face-slapping contest already sounds enough like I’d rather take my chances with an actual bear, but all for only $470? These maniacs are even crazier than I thought. 4/5 permanent handprints on face, wouldn’t hesitate to ride this man into battle.
Keep going for the video while I congratulate Zangief on the victory.
Source: Geekologie – Meanwhile In Russia: This Year’s Winner Of The Face Slapping Contest
These are several video demonstrations of the Magic Array Wireless Phone Charger (~$44 on Amazon, but probably available elsewhere). You just put your wireless charging enabled phone in the center of the circle and the magic symbols light up with some sound effects to let you know your phone is charging, and presumably summon some demons for good measure. No word if the addition of a small blood sacrifice will enable quick charging, but I have a roommate filled with more than his fair share who doesn’t know he’s gonna help me find out.
Keep going for the videos while I troubleshoot why my magic array charger isn’t working. “Your phone is like ten years old.” So? “So you probably need to microwave the charger first to make it compatible.” Now you’re making sense!
Source: Geekologie – Heck Yeah, Sorcery: Magic Array Wireless Chargers
This is a video hitting us with some pop-up facts about leptocephalus (“slim head”), the almost completely transparent larval stage of eels (among other members of the superorder Elopomorpha). Prior to their metamorphosis into the juvenile glass eel stage of their lives, the eels contain only tiny organs, a tube for a gut, and no red blood cells, resulting in their invisibility cloaks. Speaking of — I actually bought an invisibility cloak from an online wizard supply company and I plan on giving it a test just as soon as this business meeting gets too boring for me to bear anymore, which is right about now. *tosses cloak over heads, bee-lines it for the conference room door* “We can all still see your legs you know.” *removes cloak, sulks back to seat at table* Man, I accidentally bought a kids size and their return policy is bullshit.
Keep going for the video while I speculate if eels evolved this trait to look like clear pieces of plastic ocean garbage.
Source: Geekologie – A Video About The Transparent Larval Stage Of Young Eels
This is a video demonstration of a deep learning model developed by NVidia that turns sketches even a mother wouldn’t hang up on the fridge into ‘photorealistic masterpieces’ using generative adversarial networks, or GANs, which are not to be confused with *lifting pant leg* gams. “You have chicken legs.” I prefer to think of myself as a stork or heron. “Settle for a flamingo?” Only if you and I make a heart shape with our necks.
Keep going for a video demo of the system, which “acts like a smart paintbrush, converting segmentation maps into lifelike images,” which I was going to mention before you started commenting on my appearance.
Source: Geekologie – NVidia Artificial Intelligence Turns The Most Basic Sketches ‘Into Photorealistic Masterpieces’
This is a video of a restaurant employee accidentally letting a 5.5-gallon bucket of ranch dressing slip out of her hands in the kitchen and (as the guy watching the security footage says) BOOOOOOOOM! Ahahahahahahaha! *then somebody else in the background* AHUYUKYUKYUKYUK! Now I’ll be the first person to admit that I drink ranch like chocolate milk and the list of restaurants with all-you-can-eat salad bars that I’ve been banned from reads like a list of all the restaurants with all-you-can-eat salad bars, but this is not how I like my ranch. And that means something, because I even once had a girlfriend break up with me for my ranch obsession because “Please don’t, this is a wedding — can you at least wait until the reception?” Obviously *wipes ranch from chin with knuckle, puts on custom Hidden Valley branded sunglasses* I did not.
Keep going for the video (complete with slow motion and some video of the aftermath at the beginning) while I try to find some celery sticks to clean up the mess she made.
Source: Geekologie – Oh Man: Restaurant Worker Drops 5.5-Gallon Bucket Of Dressing, Gets Instant Ranch Facial Treatment
Because there aren’t any walls strong enough (until jail) to keep this man away from a few after-hours brewskis, this is some surveillance footage from a Delaware County (Delco), Pennsylvania beer distributor of a man backing his SUV through the store’s doors, then proceeding to steal three tallboys and leaving, a move that will now and forever be known as a Delco beer run.
Keep going the video while I speculate if he was apprehended two hours later while crawling back through the mess he made for more cold ones.
Source: Geekologie – Man Backs SUV Through Doors Of Closed Beer Store To Steal Three Beers
This is a video of table tennis player Adam Bobrow repeatedly demonstrating a tricky (and more importantly game-legal) around the net shot during a bunch of different matches. Some more info from Adam while I throw my paddle at my opponent just like how I’ve ended every game of ping pong I’ve ever played in my life:
From professionals (Chinese National Team member, Chen Ke and Uzbekistan National Team Member, Regina Kim), tooo college team players, coaches and local club players…. here are some around-the-net shots from challenge matches. Fun fact: when they are very low and bounce more than once… we call them “rollers” because they appear to roll.
Man, Adam does not disappoint when he tells you he’s got a fun fact coming your way — he delivers. If my fun facts were even half as fun I might actually write something I’m proud of for once. “Keep dreaming, GW.” It’s all I know.
Keep going for the video.
Source: Geekologie – Table Tennis Player’s ‘Around The Net’ Shot Reel
Note: A pretty solid scream at 0:39, watch your volume.
This is a video of a guy demonstrating what not to do when you want to put out a fire that accidentally started in your stovetop wax melter (which looks suspiciously like a can of Chef Boyardee he just cut in half). Water was not the answer in this man’s case, unless his case was how can I screw this up and hurt myself. Everybody always just assumes water is the answer to a fire, but it isn’t. Sometimes a fire just needs fewer witnesses and a lot more gasoline.
Keep going for the video (but skip to 0:30) while this guy’s body hair starts growing back patchy.
Source: Geekologie – Water Always Beats Fire, Right?: Guy Tosses Water On Stovetop Wax Melter
This is a video of singer and comedian Lil Duval demonstrating his Tesla’s Autopark feature for his mother and grandmother. They seem impressed, although his mom didn’t originally believe the car would actually be able to maneuver itself into such a tight spot. Now not to brag or anything, but I actually had a Ford Explorer that had an Autopark feature almost twenty years ago. “You put the car in neutral and let it roll down the street.” It parked itself, didn’t it? “In a neighbor’s yard.” IT WAS GROUNDBREAKING TECHNOLOGY.
Keep going for the video.
Source: Geekologie – Guy’s Mom And Grandma React His Tesla’s Autopark Feature