When it comes to economical ways to transform a room—or an entire house—you cannot beat paint. If you’re reasonably capable, you can DIY a paint job for a small amount of money and in a relatively short amount of time, and that new color on the walls can have a dramatic effect on a space. Paint can make a room feel newer, larger, and more welcoming.

If you pick the right color, that is. Choosing a paint color can be challenging, and just about everyone has had the experience of finishing up a paint job and realizing the color they chose—and just spent hours applying to the walls—just isn’t right. You can spend weeks staring at paint chips and brushing samples onto the walls and still hate the color. It’s one thing if you notice right away—you still have some easy options to adjust the shade of your paint. So what do you do if you’re out of vacation days and don’t have the extra budget (or extra energy) to start over and re-paint the room? You actually have more options than you think.

Adjust lighting

Color is light—more specifically, color is the perception of different wavelengths and frequencies of light. If you can’t stand the paint you just spent days applying to your walls, the first thing you should investigate is the lighting in the room. Try different lighting temperatures by swapping out bulbs, and change the position of lighting sources like lamps if you can. You can also try changing your lighting to be as close to natural light as possible. Adjustable bulbs that give you a range of temperatures can help you experiment with the right settings, and also allow you to create a dynamic lighting plan that changes with the light of the day.

Add more color

Like the lighting in your room, all the other colors can have an impact on your perception of the wall color. If you’ve ever seen an optical illusion involving color perception, you know how wildly different the same color can seem depending on the colors adjacent to it. So if you hate the color you’ve painted on your walls, try

• Adding an accent wall. Sure, this involves re-painting, but it’s only one wall. And choosing the right complementary color for an accent wall can make your other walls look dramatically different. You can also consider using wallpaper to create your accent wall, bringing in patterns that can have a variety of effects on your perception of the paint.

• Add decor. You can bring more color into the room with decor and trim. Bringing in more of the same color, or complementary colors from the same palette, can reinforce the color on your walls, tying it together better with the room and thus making it more attractive to your eye. Alternately, contrasting colors can have a similar transformative effect as the accent wall strategy, changing how the wall color looks.

Cover it up

Finally, if you absolutely hate the color and nothing you do seems to help but the idea of re-painting the room makes your teeth grind, you can cover it up with:

• Art. A lot of wall art can reduce the amount of the offending color you see. Paintings, photos, mirrors—get creative, and know that every piece you hang is a few more square feet of that color you won’t see.

• Furniture. Bookshelves, anyone? Placing big, tall furniture around the perimeter of the room will effectively hide the paint.

• Window treatments. Long curtains that go from floor to ceiling on your windows can both hide some of that paint and transform it a bit with a complementary or contrasting color.

• Texture. A kind of middle ground between doing nothing and re-painting the whole room, using a texture technique like sponging or ragging can add dimension and alter the shade of your wall color with a bit less effort than a total recoat.

Source: LifeHacker – How to Fix a Room When the Paint Color is All Wrong

From the preschool holiday program to an oral book report to high school musical auditions, kids are challenged throughout their school careers to perform before an audience. For many, it comes naturally, but others struggle with feelings of anxiety—classically known as stage fright.

“Feeling self-conscious is fundamental to the human experience—as a profoundly social species, we have evolved through connectedness and interdependence with one another,” said Green Brooms Music Academy music teacher Sara Garcia. “Our earliest ancestors kept each other safe through cooperation and acceptance, and the primal desire for acceptance is a vestige of very real and immediate threats to a human’s safety outside of community.”

Though it’s natural to experience stage fright, children are encouraged to overcome it for the benefits of participating in the performing arts:

• Improved cognitive, social, and motor development.

• Practicing skills like improvisation and quick thinking.

• Exploring a wider range of emotions through performance.

• Building confidence and learning to manage anxiety.

Fortunately, you can help your reluctant star manage their stage fright and even grow their self-esteem through a public performance.

“Gradually facing a feared situation, what we know as exposure, is one of the most effective ways to overcome anxiety, fears, and phobias. It helps to desensitize, build a higher tolerance level, build confidence, and reduce the anxieties surrounding performing,” said licensed professional counselor Andrea R. Tarantella.

Clues your child might have stage fright

Tarantella noted children with stage fright might experience physical symptoms that are not immediately visible to parents, like stomachaches, nausea, racing heart, dizziness, and headache. But here are other signs you may see:

• Avoiding class presentations or playing in sports events

• Fidgeting

• Pacing

• Nail-biting

• Negative self talk about their abilities

• Expressing fear of embarrassment

“With stage fright, parents can expect to see their child experience physical symptoms of stress, show a heightened fear of being evaluated in some way by others, and struggle with memory or with concentrating during performances,” Tarantella said.

Tips to help with childhood stage fright

Music teacher Dana Vachharajani said first, parents should acknowledge that stage fright is real. “Sometimes as busy parents, we might chalk up stage fright to shyness or that our children don’t like an activity, but in reality, stage fright is a condition that needs to be approached with understanding and attention. The good news is there are lots of options to help alleviate symptoms,” she said.

Try these suggestions, from both Tarantella and Vachharajani:

• Continue to give your child opportunities for public performance with gradual exposure.

• Create a supportive environment so kids feel safe expressing their fears about performance.

• Celebrate every little success when they perform.

• Before a performance, encourage your child to practice in front of one family member or a few immediate family members. When they are comfortable, have them practice for someone less familiar.

According to Tarantella, avoid these reactions to your child’s stage fright:

• Dismissing the child’s feelings

• Forcing them into uncomfortable situations

• Comparing their child to others who don’t have stage fright

• Using criticism or guilt

• Ignoring the issue altogether

Also, depending on your child’s age, you may approach stage fright differently.

Helping your kids with stage fright in elementary school

Very young children may appear shy or cling to parents when it’s time to perform.

“In some situations, a child may struggle to emotionally regulate and have a tantrum or start to cry,” Tarantella said. “At the elementary school level, nervous habits begin to develop like fidgeting, biting their nails, or twirling their hair.”

You may need to get teachers’ and coaches’ support to help them build confidence.

“There might be times when your kind and patient support are enough and then there are going to be moments when we need a team,” Vachharajani said. “If stage fright is happening in school, please let the teacher know to start small with the activities in class that are public facing. Discuss with coaches, dance teachers, and other trusted people in their lives.”

Helping your kids with stage fright in middle school

Tweens and teens are known for their self-consciousness, comparing themselves to peers, and growing concerns about social status.

“Around these ages, stage fright can look a lot like avoidance and/or defiance if they are so anxious that they’ll defy an authority figure or get a bad grade to prevent them from having to perform,” Tarantella said.

Vachharajani suggests these tips for helping a reluctant middle schooler:

• Don’t push too hard. Pressure and long discussions about stage fright may cause them to shut down.

• Recognize it can take some children years to be comfortable with public performance as they work through their emotions about it.

“Stage fright doesn’t disappear overnight or after the first successful presentation,” she said. “We have to be aware that this might manifest itself in other situations. Be supportive and start with simple steps.”

Helping your kids with stage fright in high school

In high school, parents may need to back off and let teens explore their independence when it comes to public performance. However, you can always be available to support them when they show signs of performance anxiety and help them set realistic goals.

Vachharajani suggests using the power of non-verbal affirmations.

“If it’s performance time and there are still some lingering jitters, have them visualize a calm place for them or create a phrase to have them repeat in their mind. If they don’t know where to focus during a performance, choose a comfort focal point they can see. Let your child know where you will be so that they can see you in the audience. If this isn’t possible, have them find a focal point above the heads of the crowd, so that they don’t have to look at faces,” she said.

What if it’s more than just stage fright?

Mild stage fright is temporary nervousness that goes away after the impending performance. Moderate stage fright may include more noticeable symptoms like sweating, racing heart, trembling, and making mistakes. Even then, Tarantella said, there should be no lasting distress after the performance is over.

How can you tell if your child’s level of performance anxiety goes beyond that, and they need professional counseling to help?

“Severe and potentially diagnosable levels of stage fright are when parents will want to be sure that they seek professional help to prevent further impairment and interference in their child’s academic, social and emotional well-being,” Tarantella said. “At this level, parents may see their children struggle with panic attacks, severe self-doubt, intense fear, and avoidance of the performance situation. At this level, parents may notice this anxiety is significantly debilitating, impacting their ability to perform, and also persists over time.”

Source: LifeHacker – An Age-by-Age Guide to Helping Your Kid Get Over Stage Fright

Old, outdated wallpaper can be a frustrating challenge to tackle. It takes some doing to get it all off, and if you don’t have the right tools, wallpaper removal can mean endless scraping, shreds of old paper clinging to the walls, and mediocre results in the end. But there is a way to get that old paper off the walls once and for all and make your walls look like new again.

For this project, you’ll need: 

• A wallpaper scoring tool

• A drop cloth

• A spray bottle

• Some wallpaper stripper

• A scraping tool

• A sponge

• Some sandpaper

Gloves and a bucket will also come in handy.

What to prepare before removing wallpaper

Pull all your furniture away from the wall and turn off the power to the lights and outlets in the room you’re working on to protect them as well as avoid the danger of shock if the outlet or light circuits get wet. Cover outlets and switches with plastic or tape, and then put down a drop cloth to protect the floor.

Before you start, check what kind of wallpaper you have. If it’s peel-able, you need to peel off the top layer of the paper, and you don’t need to score it before dousing it with stripper. If it’s removable, you can skip all the other steps and just peel it off the wall, using a little bit of the stripper if you have stubborn sticky spots. For peel-and-stick, you’ll have to see if it will come off in larger pieces. If it’s been up for a while, you might need to treat it the way you would treat other types of wallpaper because heat and damage to the surface can make it difficult to peel. If it’s vinyl or paper, follow the steps for removal.

How to score and strip wallpaper

Next, you can score the surface of the wallpaper by running the wallpaper scoring tool over the wall, puncturing the paper to allow the stripper to seep through. Make sure to get as far into the nooks and crannies as you can to avoid leaving paper clinging to the corners of the room, making it hard to remove. If your tool doesn’t reach the corners, you can use a utility knife or even a fork to get in there and make a few punctures in the paper.

Once the surface is scored all over, spray your stripper onto the wall, making sure not to get too much on other nearby surfaces in the process. If you prefer a less harsh method, mixing one part white vinegar with three parts water can work with some types of wallpaper.

The solution should be allowed to soak in for about an hour. To test to see if it’s time to peel, try pulling up a corner. If it comes away easily, you can start removing. If not, wait a few more minutes or add some more stripper if your wallpaper hasn’t been fully soaked. If the stripper is working, you should see the wallpaper start to wrinkle and pull away from the wall in some places.

Once the paste begins to let go, peel the paper away from the wall by hand as much as you can. Use your scraping tool to work on areas where the glue might be a bit thicker. The paper should come off fairly easily now, but if you’re still encountering areas where it’s still firmly stuck, you can douse it again with the stripper and scrape again.

Next, any remnants of the glue or smaller shreds can be scrubbed off with a sponge and some stripper. Using the rough side of the sponge can help get the stickier globs of glue off of the wall. You might need to repeat this part of the process a few times to get all of the glue off the wall.

What to do after removing wallpaper

Last, once the wall is dry, you can use some sandpaper to scrub away any tiny bits of paper or rough patches left behind. You should only do this step if you have walls that are newer than 1978, though. If they’re older, you need to assume there’s lead in the paint and avoid creating dust that can enter your body through your lungs.

Once your walls are smooth, apply a primer to even out the color of the wall and seal it before proceeding to the new wallpaper or paint. Just make sure everything is fully dry before putting a coat of primer on the wall so the paint will dry evenly without streaking.

Source: LifeHacker – The Best Way to Remove Old Wallpaper

If you’re curious about choking during sex, you’re not alone. A 2020 national probability survey of Americans aged 18 to 60 years found that 21% of women reported having been choked during sex with 20% of men reporting they had choked a partner during sex. With “Choke Me Daddy” memes making the rounds on social media and beyond, it’s not surprising that the survey also found that adults aged 18 to 29 engage in choking at much higher rates than older adults.

Although choking, also known as erotic asphyxiation, might heighten curiosity and arousal for some, it’s not without its risks. Here’s what you need to know to ensure your safety and have a good time.

Why would someone want to be choked during sex?

“Choking, erotic asphyxiation, or—as it’s known in the kink community—breath play, is an activity in which a partner (or oneself, as in autoerotic asphyxiation) restricts the airflow of someone’s breathing by adding pressure around their throat and windpipe,” says Lisa Finn, Babeland’s sex educator.

Finn says choking can be really hot for a number of the same reasons that any more “risky” form of play, especially BDSM play, can be.

“There’s the adrenaline of the danger behind it, pain for pleasure, the physical sensation of pressure and lightheadedness, and the sort of primal and aggressive energy of being handled in a more assertive way,” she says. “One of the biggest appeals of choking we hear about is the exchange of power. The emotional and physical aspect of taking control over or surrendering and having a release from control with something that could really hurt (or even kill) and the trust and intimacy that goes with that.”

When it comes to the physical effects of choking, Finn says the sensation of being choked sends a spike of adrenaline through our system and “kicks the sympathetic nervous system (aka, the danger response, like fight or flight) into gear. Paired with the high-like lightheadedness and an already heightened state from arousal, this can have effects like added intensity or even a sort of euphoric sensation to orgasm.”

What are the risks of being choked during sex?

While it might be considered erotic by some, choking during sex can also be lethal with autoerotic asphyxia being estimated to cause 250-1,000 deaths per year in the United States.

“Choking is extremely dangerous, and if you don’t do it correctly, you can give someone permanent brain damage or even kill them,” says sexologist Marla Renee Stewart, sexpert for Lovers sexual wellness brand and retailer.

That is why she highly suggests taking a class on choking to ensure that your lover is safe and that you are utilizing correct techniques.

“It is considered Edge Play for a reason,” Stewart says. “You need to decide if you want to do an air choke or a blood choke. I highly suggest the former because it is easier for people who are new to kink and it’s really about the restriction of breath, rather than restriction of blood flow to the brain. With a blood choke you can squeeze the very important interior and exterior jugular veins. So this is why I think this kind of choking should only be reserved for those who are familiar with extreme play and the safety precautions necessary. You also need to have safety guards in place such as safe words, gestures, and knowledge around warning signs that you are harming someone.”

For someone who has experienced trauma and wants to introduce choking into their sex life, Stewart recommends going to a kink-aware and trauma-informed coach, therapist, or counselor first and then going to someone who is experienced at using kink to transform the trauma in people’s lives. Ideally, she says it would be great if these were two different people to work together to “ensure that you are getting the care you need. In addition, making sure that you are educated about the various aspects of choking and knowing how to do it properly. I believe going slowly and integrating various aspects of choking is best and to do this over time.”

What are some important things people need to discuss before they introduce choking?

First and foremost, Finn says, scene negotiation and safety are essential, as they are with any BDSM acts, but especially one that can be as dangerous as breath play, which has some serious physical risks like injury, brain damage, or even death.

“There are emotional and mental risks to this kind of play as well,” she says. “Being choked without warning or discussion, feeling like the experience is one-sided, or any way of having breath play go outside of your boundaries can be terrifying and traumatic.”

Finn recommends taking the time to discuss this with your partner and knowing what it is about choking that turns you on is essential here, too. Are you into the physical sensation? Do you want your choking to be aggressive or tender? Is a “struggle” part of the dynamic of the roleplay, or is that a sign that something is wrong?

“Having misaligned expectations in any intense scene can lead to a less pleasurable or even downright uncomfortable experience, physically and emotionally,” Finn explains.

Second, Finn suggests making a safeword and a safe action (or “safe gesture”).

“A safeword is a word that you can call out that communicates the need for all action to stop for any reason, and is especially important during intense play like this,” she says. “When you are choking your partner, you should not be reaching the point where they cannot speak. That’s a sign that you’ve passed a line of physical safety.”

However, if you or your partner get to that point of not speaking because of airflow obstruction or if there’s any other reason someone may be unable to clearly speak or clearly hear when a safeword is used (for example, if there’s loud music, if a partner may go non-verbal, if a partner is hard of hearing) it’s essential, she says, to have a safe action in addition to a safeword. Some examples for safe actions that Finn recommends include: squeaking a toy, dropping a set of keys, tapping your partner twice (“tapping out”), or raising an open palm in a “stop” gesture.

If your partner becomes non-responsive, it’s key to stop all play immediately and seek medical attention.

Source: LifeHacker – Is Choking During Sex Ever Really Safe?

No matter how much you love your home, after living in it for a while you’re bound to get a bit bored or dissatisfied with how it looks. But redecorating, renovating, and repairing a home can get pretty expensive. And if you don’t own your home, you’re not going to want to invest a lot of money into cosmetic changes. But there’s an answer that has probably never occurred to you: your local dollar store.

Dollar stores can be an amazing resource when you’re trying to save a little money, and home repairs and renovations are no exception. For a small amount of money, you can do a lot to freshen up your home.

Supplies

The first thing to realize is that the dollar store actually has many of the tools and supplies you’ll need for basic maintenance and home improvements. From tools like hammers and screwdrivers to caulk, duct tape, and paint supplies, if you’re trying to get something done around the house or need to fix a broken toilet or door lock for cheap, the dollar store is your answer.

The tools are obviously also made cheaply and won’t last, and you’re not going to be doing precision work with these materials. But if your goal is just to get a project done without having to donate plasma for extra cash, the dollar store will have what you need for basic projects.

Wall tiles

One of the most versatile things you can buy at a dollar store to improve your home is removable wall tiles. These peel-and-stick tiles can be stuck on any wall and will stand up to mild moisture, making them usable as kitchen backsplashes. They can be cut down and used on just about any vertical surface, in fact, and you can get them in many different styles, including some that mimic the look of tile.

Flooring

If you have a gnarly old floor that needs covering up—or warming up—you can source area rugs at any dollar store for $5 a pop. For more coverage, buy carpet mats to cover an entire floor, either as one style to create the illusion of a single carpet, or with a creative pattern created from different styles.

Floating storage

You can find fabric boxes, wicker baskets, and other storage solutions at any dollar store. You can also find Command strips or other fasteners that you can use to attach that storage to your walls, getting all your junk off the floor and onto attractive floating shelves or baskets.

Wallpaper

Like stick-on wall tiles, removable wallpaper can take a boring, plain wall or other vertical surface and jazz it up nicely. As long as you’re careful to line up the sheets accurately, the final result can look spectacular and can be peeled off whenever you need to. For example, you can make your stairs pop by applying some wallpaper to the risers, giving them some artistic dimension for just a few dollars and a few hours of work.

Mirror art

One of the simplest ways to create a striking piece of wall art is to pick up a few sets of cheap mirrors (like these hexagon mirrors, for example) and arrange them creatively on a wall. It’s super cheap and super simple, but the end result is both geometric and reflective, which is a lot of visual bang for very few bucks.

Window treatments

The surest sign that you’re a real live adult who does adult things is caring about your window treatments. Curtains can get pricey, but you can find them at your local dollar store for less than $20, along with the necessary hardware if your windows don’t already have it. You’ll be amazed at the transformation of your room.

Solar lighting

If you have an outdoor space or a small patio as part of your home, some cheap solar lights can make it much more usable after the sun has set. Without adding any extra burden to your electric bill, a few stake lights can make any outdoor area safer and easier to use. Plus, they can double as emergency lighting during blackouts.

Source: LifeHacker – 7 Home Improvement Projects You Can Source From the Dollar Store