Every oce in a while, a movie comes along that is so resoundingly terrible that it achieves perfection. It doesn’t just have a lame twist, awful acting, or some kind of cheesy technology. It has everything. And that’s exactly the vibe you’ll get from Replicas, the astoundingly ridiculous new movie starring Keanu Reeves and the robot from I, Robot.

So here’s the plot of Replicas, insofar as one can call it a plot. Reeves is a neuroscientist who has a heads-up display that allows him to teleport (???) his dead wife and children’s minds into other bodies (???) or maybe robots (???) or maybe clone them (???). Any movie that earns 12 question marks based on the trailer alone is already destined for cult-classic status.

There are robots that look just like the CGI from I, Robot, which is convenient. Also there is some kind of technology that plunges a needle into your eye, because as I said, this movie has everything. Reeves’ lab partner is played by Thomas Middleditch (Silicon Valley), which made me think that at any moment, a crazy VC was going to show up and try to invest in something. A social media platform that stabs your eyes preemptively before you start posting? Sounds great! [Bong hit.]